North of You

Hello?!?!

It's me!!

Right here!!

Do you know I am here anymore?

I might know a lot of people...but who is here for me?

I call those who are my 'friends'

but all I get is a ring.

Two hours later and you call me back?

I take you places.

I open your the doorway for you.

But you let things get between us.

You leave me behind because apparently I do not matter.

I hand you my all.

My heart,

my care,

my attention,

my money,

my friends,

my car,

my money...

guess its a waste of energy.

My words mean nothing.

My intelligence and insight pushed aside.

Lets allow desires and lust,

others who can show you attention and say sweet nothings,

let them draw a wedge between us.

Sad.

Lame.

Do not stand up for me.

Do not allow your eyes to see.

I do not deserve to be ignored.

I do not deserve to have a relationship pushed aside time and time again

because of given attention.

You get new friends.

I stand here hurt

because I feel used, abused, forfeited to have something else.

One day we'll look back and say what happened.

I'll look back to these moments

when I was hung out to dry

and I might walk away.

I might stay.

But I could not believe how little worth I had to you

to be disposed of so easily.

I am supposed to be happy with my life now right?

I have a person to treat me right.

School is right there.

A good paying job.

A family that loves me.

.......so why am must I feel horrible....

Unafraid to tell you what others are thinking

I am the one who pays for it.

Caring for others,

Incidentally getting what others wanted and want...

why must I feel horrible.

Just move along

like you are already doing.

I do not know who you are turning into,

where everyone is going,

but I -

I am here.

Do you remember I'm here?

North of you. West of your future.